Beltane Remembrances

Five years ago today, I sat in sacred plant ceremony for the first time. I peeled away the layers of this world that I knew and felt comfortable with. It was terrifying. Yet, when I realized there was no escaping it and let go, I received spiritual guidance and support to remove restrictions in my mind and body and unify with love consciousness… the energy of abundance, truth, and emptiness.

A realization that there is enough in this very moment, for myself and everyone, to live peacefully in the NOW. (Read: Let your dramas go!)

I was given the opportunity to rebirth myself, to find my way. I am not a perfected being of course, but I will always carry that experience with me in my heart and not only believe, but know, it is the ultimate truth for us all.

There is always enough time and energy for love. Drop your judgements, this moment is unfolding, feel it with love in your heart and body… even if it’s bearing loving witness to horrendous pain.

Be a portal for an expression, rather than playing a role for a particular outcome.

May all beings be free of suffering. Blessed May Day wishes to us all!~*°

Continue~Yin

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Keeping in tune
with yin,
with in.

Outward movement, y observation.
My babies, mi niño, y mijo.

Greater trochanter,
ego, child…
release
receive.

Es segura niña.
Birthing unfamiliar.

Mi familia
en inglés
amando por Armando.

Heart-mind opens
pink into kind-hearted,
supple red.

Tears of sunshine kisses.
Rubbing the white feathers out of my eyes I am feed. I can see!

No big fucKINGQUEEN deal.
Nada del otro mundo.

Same, Same.

Releasing, releasing.
This moment gloriously shows itself.

A story in one hand, opportunity in the breath, perspective in the mind, and one hand on the heart.

Abhaya.

I breathe.
practice complete.

To be continueYin’d.

dhanurasana

Recently I had a great postpartum spontaneous yoga flow in my studio, I mean kitchen. In this beautiful space I thought I might like to catalog my practice or inspirations on my blog, since I am not currently teaching anywhere at the moment.

One thing my 10 years as a bodyworker has taught me is that collective consciousness and experience(s), are a real deal. The proof for me has manifested in cyclical affects on mind-body energetic flow due to the season or cosmic forces.

Just think to yourself of the countless ways a lack, or an abundance of sun changes your mental or physical state of being. Provided, you live somewhere with seasons of course.

My intention is to share poses that support earth rhythms in alignment with my northwestern hemisphere region of life. This is my self study, writing furthers my understanding, and yet maybe it’ll help someone else in the long run. : )

My posts that begin with a yoga pose or practice in Sanskrit will more than likely be a part of this cataloging. I’ll also tag the posts asana. To save time, I am not going to go into detail as to how these yoga poses (asana) effect mind-body energy. Perhaps in other dedicated posts. But let the practice, and experience be the teacher moreso.

The current rhythm, in my corner of the world, is a returning of light/sun energy and richness of life from the earth in Spring.

Our bodies are receiving a greater potential to synergize our personal power/truth within Earth energies to make our deeper powers manifest.

These energies present through the expansive energies of our core (solar plexus) seeking connection downward, to the depth of our roots/Selves (hips, legs and feet) and beyond… to the nexus of Self and other, and Self and the Mother Earth.

These connections and relationships, can be observed and experienced by witnessing life and experience for what it IS in any moment, authentically sharing oneself plus an ability to be present for all cycles of the regeneration process.

Living, pure potential.

Here is an astrological forecast, and perspective of the current cosmic influences.Cosmic foo-foo. 😉

This was my practice this morning. The asana is not exact, to save time. But I’m posting the general and most relevant poses.

BEgin:
Sit comfortably and tall, breathe.

Chanting:
Om
Om Ma Durga
Ah, Om, Hung, Ram, Dzha (Tibetan Seed Syllables)

Asana:
Child’s pose (CP)
Prana flow/ Spinal “wave” free-flow (Moving through or similar to cat cow with a lot of personal interpretation.)
Cobra
CP
Down dog, dolphin
Plank on forearms
Dolphin
“Dolphin Dives” like little push-ups in Dolphin. In preparation for headstand, or for me the kramas (steps) to headstand.
CP
dhanurasana pose directions via YJ
rest, repeat 2 times
Dolphin
Plank on forearms
Dolphin
Dolphin Dives
Cobra
CP
Down dog
Mountain
Warrior 2, triangle
Repeat other side
Bridge (mini aka shoulders down)
rest, repeat 2 times
shavasana w mantra:
“I am forgiving. I am forgiven” spoken once.
shavasana meditation/release/ receptivity

Chant:
Om namah shivaya gurave
satchidananda murtaye
nishprapanchaya shantaya
niralambaya tejase
(I honor the essence of being, the auspicious one, the luminous teacher within and without, who assumes the forms of truth, consciousness, and bliss, is never absent, full of peace, ultimately free and sparkles with a divine luster.)

The result:
Heart open and cleansed. A stronger core. A present mind with deeper insight and determination, yet the added bonus of flexibility. Thank you union of self, heart and mind!

Here’s a photo of me that I took in my studio-kitchen inspired by the #fmsphotoaday challenge. Today’s theme is Shapes, which made me think of asana shapes! I was in triangle, trikonasana.
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Om Ma Durga Om

Appreciating Durga today.

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The divine goddess of love and motherhood. She loves so fiercely that within her being is every “weapon” that spiritual warriors could posses. Her presence radiates beauty, confidence, acceptance, and strength… she has the loving awareness to witness all “evil, darkness, ego” gone astray with such divine power that the “evil, darkness, ego” wishes be released from itself. It simply offers itself to her to die under the swiftness of her sword.

At least, this is the way I understand her, taught to me by Dr. Manoj Chalam.

Karmic reweaving of mother/child-hood has been thick, in my sleeping and waking dreams the last few days. In this I experience prophetic dreams, symbolic messages, vibrational detoxes, and toddler-triggers galore!

Yesterday, my sweet toddler was pushing every button I had. I saw and felt my reactions and equally rose above said triggers and unconsciously reacted to them. When I reacted, I immediately felt what I was doing to my child, and to myself, by being angry. I communicated as best I could to him that I was reacting poorly and that I was sorry for my lack of patience.

In fleeting moments of silence, or in split seconds of post-trigger awareness, I would quickly pray. “Dear God, Great Spirit, please forgive me and guide me to be a better mother.”

I knew better than to believe I was a shitty parent and horrible mother. Sure, I felt that way, but I knew better than to let my heart attach itself to the sticky entrapment of misery presenting itself to me. Yet it took an unwavering commitment to say NO to it, every time.

Before going to sleep I was following through with a few logistical texts with our baby’s nanny, and friend in the spirit tribe in Boise. I let her know I was going to bed, and thus I did not see her replies until morning. Her last text to me, wished that I be filled with white light. Which she’d never said via text before.

It was sweet to read upon waking, as she didn’t know of the internal struggle I was challenged with and it was also supportive of the guidance that came to my dreams that night:

I was in a large stadium with people I knew and didn’t know. I found my 4 year old son there and he informed me that he was like his Dad and he has coyote medicine within him. Coyote is a shape shifter, and also a bit of a PLAYful instigator I believe. This gave me an “ah-ha” within my being and helped me understand why he is the way he is. Read: why I get triggered the way I do. 😉

I then was given an assignment to teach yoga in the stadium and I knew it had to be a heart-centric practice so that people could feel the loving acceptance I was feeling after my “ah-ha.” I was walking to where I would be teaching and I had an invisible presence next to me whispering that I create a perfect mantra for this experience. The presence felt masculine, and fatherly. He was helping me with my mantra as I would hope to help my son learn: patiently. As we walked the conversation went like this:

What would be best to start the mantra with?

….Om. Yes Om, the sound of creation.

Yes. That is good. And what shall follow it? What makes YOU feel loved?

Durga! Yes Durga should follow Om!

(Silent presence, knowing there’s a better answer.)

Oh wait, Ma! Ma Durga!

Very well! And let it finish with Om too. 🙂

Om Ma Durga Om!

I felt love and loved, and full of joy! The feeling increased every time I repeated it and I also felt so happy to have created just the right mantra to use in the waking dream to give me power on my path. I awoke shortly after.

I have a feeling that it was either one of my most relied upon teachers Babaji, or very likely Maharaj-ji visiting me in my dreams. I have been reading Maharaj-ji influences a lot lately through Ram Dass’ book Be Love Now for a book club I recently put in motion.

Shadow work, ie Karmic reweaving, is powerful when you arm yourself with awareness. I am thankful for the love of Durga and that of the True Christ that resides in my heart. I am thankful that my soul is armed in the soft, white feathers of owl and can wisely navigate within darkness. I am happy to have love in my home plus circles upon circles of divine beauty and embodiment in friendships in my city.

We should all be so lucky.

Fundamentals of Christ Consciousness Energy, the Energy of the Heart.

In it’s barest of bones, Christ consciousness is comprised of a couple of lines and a circle. Imagine that, a cross, with special attention drawn to where the two lines intersect by way of a circle. This image is also known as a Pagan cross or Celtic cross.

These two elements represent feminine and masculine energy combined. Circles obviously being feminine and lines representing male energy. However, I would say that the center line represents masculinity more so in regards to this idea. As a friend and I joked today, sometimes masculine energy might make a line pointing up, or it might point down, but nonetheless it always makes a line! 😉

Christ consciousness in our bodies lies in the union of masculine and feminine energy. Thus, represented in the heart of the lines creating the cross-hairs of opposing forces in the Pagan cross. What is interesting in the idea of “opposing” forces is that they are merely two essential ingredients that facilitate the act of compassion and forgiveness. I will get back to this concept in a moment.

Let us consider the image of a Pagan cross as a map of energy. I will try to explain how I see it for myself, and I welcome any ideas and feedback whether they are supportive or critical of these concepts.

First, we can see that the Pagan cross has three components: the circle, horizontal line, and vertical line.

If we see both the horizontal and vertical lines of the cross representing the human body, we can then associate a right and a left side. This is important because of the essential elements of masculine and femininity within each body. These concepts have been embraced through cultures of all times, through out all corners of the world. Plus they are commonly accepted and appreciated in most health minded beings today.

Within these two hemispheres, the left side represents feminine energies and the right masculine. Feminine qualities manifest in the physical realm through receptivity, a quiet, constant energy and presence, and with a certain coolness to it. Masculine energies are active, move forward or up, and have heat.

Taking a look at the circle, I see that it is reflective of two things, the Earth and the container that holds a union of male and female, yin and yang, and the positive and negative components that comprise our material world. I find it a beautiful metaphor that the circle can represent Mother Earth, and that there is a special relationship between it and the lines that form the cross, and therefore everything that it represents in our bodies and in Christ’s embodiment.

There is an essential element for Christ to exhist and of course it denotes a feminine presence. We can definitely take this literally to see the importance of the relationship between Mother Mary birthing Christ’s consciousness onto this planet, also feminine: Earth.

The harmony and circle/line symbolism of Mother Mary and the Divine Feminine Mother Earth and Christ consciousness can also be found in our body’s circular joints and long-bones. Circular joints store feminine energy meanwhile long bones possess more masculine influences. We can see that the pelvic “bowl” representing the bones of the pelvis are feminine in nature, when you consider the “empty” space that the inner framework creates. The spine is masculine and the skull feminine because of its round shape. Here we also find the importance of union between masculine and feminine in the spine and brain. These two parts are integral to our central nervous system. Also, I have to note the similarities between a penis and the spine and skull. Oh the beauty of the lingam (penis) and its shaft and head! Beautiful isn’t it!?

Even though it could be a semi-safe assumption to say that the mind is masculine because it is active in nature, that would be to overlook that it is simply its current conditioned state in our culture today. I believe it is feminine because the brain is mostly comprised of water, the eyes which are extensions of the brain are circular, and we have the ability to tap into deep metaphoric pools of wisdom when we practice slowing the activity of our monkey-minds down and tap into Universal energy. (A relevant and worthwhile video on this notion by way of an Alaskan indigenous elder: http://youtu.be/en4TKmldjrM)

Going back to the sum of the opposing forces within the cross being essential to facilitate forgiveness and compassion, I will reference the Hawaiian Hoʻoponopono prayer, which is: I love you. I’m sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you. These words have both a feminine and masculine context in my heart and mind which relate to the equidistant cross within the circle of the Pagan cross. They also represent the journey of cultivating Christ consciousness in our bodies and releasing karma, wounds, and blockages to bring about healing, through a process of honoring these four particular elements.

The left side is the Divine Feminine’s presence: I love you.
The bottom line denotes a lower vibration of our human experience: I’m sorry.
The right side is the active act of Christ’s forgiveness: Please forgive me.
The upper line denotes a higher vibration of our human experience: Thank you.
All of these lines and hemispheres have their own, and collective movement or energy and consciousness. Yet together they form the totality, the union, of it all.

I will mention that this is a somewhat western viewpoint, mostly because of the Christian undertones. However, we could also say the cross-hairs represent Krishna consciousness or any particular deities embodying forgiveness and compassion.

Now we have a map of source energy found at our heart’s center, which Christ embodied. I did not find this as a scholar of books and literature, but of bodies and through sacred teachers that that speak to me through my heart and grant me visions and words through my third eye in mediations and while holding sacred space giving reiki-massage healings. Thanks to Talat Phillips recent novel, The Electric Jesus I have become inspired to seek out the other Gnostic texts. If you have a favorite, please share this with me.

To me, I see how this map demonstrates that no aspect of life is one single point, that there is force behind everything regardless if we are able to see it. It portrays a culmination of Earthly forces within the opportunity and process of healing. It is of upmost importance in our current evolution of a species finding harmony with each other and the Earth through our heart’s center.

This map can illustrate the blue-print for the essential components to layer with the free-energy torus (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4vZRKVJQKUk) over the pagan cross and superimpose that onto our bodies, in efforts to create a vital, healthy, abundant flow.

If you wish to use these concepts to heal yourself, I suggest a meditation while sitting upright and visualizing your center axis, or shashumna, as the vertical line with a horizontal line at your heart’s center rather than where it would intersect at the literal horizontal line of your arms. However, where ever you place your cross will bring healing to the center of it. While you sit and connect to your breath and the visual of the cross within your body, you can visualize the reflexology zone-therapy lines (http://isabellehutton.com/images/reflex.points.map.GIF) creating lines that make up a torus, while intending on cycling your energy down and through the lines.

You will sense where things flow and where they don’t. These areas are nothing to be ashamed or frightened of. They are the doorways to healing. By placing the cross hairs of your Pagan cross in the center of these places you can say the Hoʻoponopono prayer, the Lord’s prayer, or another compassion-evoking mantra that you resonate with, or viewing an image or color that you feel brings energy, health, vitality, and healing.

I also encourage you to keep your visual of the cross at your heart’s center and simply see the energy flowing through the torus, zones, and center channel as flowing and healthy, golden, and vibrant rather than seeing that it is blocked while you continue to cycle the energy through and breath steadily and calmly. It will foster subconscious patterning that supports health and awareness.

These blocks are karmic and oftentimes more related to our ancestor’s contribution to the energy that comprises our DNA, than our own stories in our conscious awareness of our lives thus far. By doing this practice, we can honor ourselves as portals into a new humanity of our genetic line into abundance through love, forgiveness, and compassion and our bravery that it takes to forge the path.

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This post is intended to be the foundation for future posts on the nature of energy in our bodies and opportunities to use the divine harmonic frequencies of masculine and feminine energies together to transform and evolve our species and ourselves. I hope you enjoy them and I learn by the people I meet, both online and off, so if you have anything to share in response with me, I greatly appreciate it and welcome the opportunity to learn from you.

To honor us all on the path of learning and evolving, Jai!

Waves lapping

Aside

my warm heart slowly melting golden,
dripping down to the ground.
A tree, my Self,
softening and sapping.

Yellow, orange, amber
rolling down, down, closer to the ground
into one another. Blending with
light, sight and your eyes.

Waves lapping,
ocean of time
beyond my mind and
in my breath.

Ardha Chandrasana,
a balancing waxing/waning moon.

Butterfly wing,
heart kisses.
Eyes of my child
fasten my root to earth.

And to my infinite mother
thank you.